The McGuinness Unit

Now known as Junction 17, The McGuinness Unit was a specialist Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS)... aka a psych ward for young people aged 13-17. You may have heard of it from the BBC Three documentary series, Don't Call Me Crazy (Link below). The crazy thing is that I signed a release form to be filmed for this documentary while I was at the McGuinness Unit for groups but I was shipped off to Utah to a different treatment centre before they started filming (a story for another day). I'm glad to say I dodged that bullet.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p01b86w5

November 2011, I made my third suicide attempt and landed myself in the above unit. My dad broke down my barricaded bedroom door and found me in a pool of my own blood, barely responsive. When I got to the hospital they sectioned me. This wasn't my first psych ward visit but it was my first in the UK and there were big differences. In the U.S they want you in and out. They basically just dose you up and send you on your way.. (in my experience atleast). However here in the UK, I spent over 3 months at the McGuinness Unit. Three of the worst months of my life.

Let me just tell you one story that will sum the McGuinness Unit up nicely. Us kids (I was 14 at the time) were playing around and yes, okay, probably misbehaving slightly, but nothing major. We were all laughing, no one was getting hurt. The staff (who were mostly, im sorry, but power hungry sadistic evil c***s (dad say's he couldn't agree more)) told us to calm down or we were going to bed early. Fair enough. We calmed down and sat quietly chatting in the living room. I used to go to sleep early every night but the girls I'd made friends with asked me to stay up with them for once so that was the plan. The staff then came in and yelled early bedtime. I put up a little fuss cause that wasn't fair in my head, which, still, looking back it wasn't. Everyone went to bed but me. Then all the staff (about 5-6 of them) crowded around me and told me if I didn't go to bed now there'd be 'hands on'. I did not even have a second to move before they all pounced on me. I freaked out and grabbed one woman by the hair and booted another in the face by accident when she tried to take my shoes off. A man of quite of a size sat on me in an alleged attempt to restrain me and I couldn't breathe. I remember thinking I was going to pass out. Eventually they all dragged me down the hallway like something from the exorcist - arms held out and toes dragging and kicking on the floor. They threw me into a room with nothing but four walls and quickly slammed the door, which had a window for them to watch me like a zoo attraction. I found a splinter of wood and stabbed my wound with it so I could write 'f**k you!' In blood on the wall. After hours of crying and screaming this made them finally come in. They offered me a strong sedative in the form of pill or injection. My choice. Oh lucky me! I chose the pill, obviously. I was allowed to lay on a bed after that but I was back in the safety hall. The cheek of this story is, that I actually got sent to the police station accused of assaulting the women who I accidentally kicked in the face while they were incorrectly restraining me. Something else I was being accused of, which okay was true, was bringing a sizeable amount of weed into the hospital unit. This shows just how insecure the unit really was (although we did try and break out but unfortunately that was not as easy as bringing in contraband). All charges got dropped under the Mental Health Act.

A mini interview with my dad about the whole experience:

1. What are your thoughts on the McGuinness Unit?

"From the outset, I had deep misgivings about Millie being 'sentenced' to a term in McGuinness. It struck me as a victorian work house, and, I am sad to say, most of the staff, especially the night staff, were just what one might expect at a workhouse if they still existed. They were more like prison warders than carers for children. However much the psychiatrists might have tried to help these teenagers, their efforts were undermined by the non-clinical staff. I could rail on about this place for a lot longer, but this is Millie's blog not time. One thing I would say is this: I know that the NHS has spent a lot of money on raising the old buildings to the ground and replacing them with a very fancy piece of architecture, but even though a non victorian setting has to be an improvement, it will mean nothing unless the staff are properly trained and empathic."

2. Are there any positive aspects, in your memory, to my time in Prestwich?

"Absolutely nothing in terms of Millie's treatment. This was one of the most depressing periods of my life and I had to have my anti-depressants increased during that period. However, I made a trip to see Millie almost every night and the memories of my time with Millie are very positive indeed. No computers were allowed in the 'cells', but I used to smuggle my macbook in and Millie and I would watch Fawlty Towers together. Millie has only recently become less fussy about what she eats. But at the time, even if she had no food idiosyncrasies, the food at McGuinness was barely edible. I used to smuggle in snacks and one night I went to the Prestwich Pizza express and picked up an 'American' and the staff at the restaurant very kindly wrapped it in clingfilm so that it's delicious smell would not alert the 'prison warders'. Despite everything, those nights with Millie will stay with me forever"

3. Do you think Mental Health Services could improve?

"Mental health provision in the U.K. is a disgrace. Government after government have neglected this key medical specialism. And CAMHS has suffered in particular. Hardly any of the psychiatrists that Millie met worked full time. This is not only a clinical and moral issue, it is also an economic one. If we don't provide adequately for our children's mental health problems, they will continue, as have Millie's, into adulthood. So many of these kids have so much to offer society, and we will never benefit because they are too poorly to contribute."

To back up what my dad just said, in 2017, 12.5 million working days were lost due to work related stress, depression, or anxiety and that's among the working population. We just don't know how many working days could have been provided by those kids who will never be given the opportunity.

And when it comes to the McGuinness Unit, they knocked the building down, rebuilt it and changed the name to Junction 17; which I can only assume was due to the bad press of the documentary. However, in my opinion, the main problem was the staff. I returned to the ward to see a friend who was admitted but I wasn't allowed in because the SAME staff recognised me as a previous inpatient. I still can’t wrap my head around this.

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